"The Jock Itch" with Jasmine Sadry: Dez's Advisor--"With No Football, I Worry"
DALLAS (105.3 THE FAN) Leading off Today's "Jock Itch:" Cowboys darling Dez Bryant has been causing quite a public stir this past week with "Saggy Pants-gate 2011" and now his adviser, David Wells, is saying that he's concerned for him! Many people have Dez on the tick-tick Cowboys' time bomb watch, in light of his antics at North Park Mall this week, prompting Wells to say: "I told Dez this the other day. I don't worry about him during the football season. It's now, with NO football, that I worry." And, of course, Valley Ranch is also shut down because the NFL is closed right now so there really IS no football focal point for him at the moment.
Can't we at least get him into a flag football league somewhere? Hell, at this point, even playing cubicle football with pieces of folded up paper! ANYTHING!! http://www.fannation.com/#ixzz1HXvWf1So
And in OTHER "itch" worthy news...
Seattle quarterback Matt Hasselbeck's 5-year-old son has quite the knack for picking his NCAA tournament bracket! This little tyke is in the top ONE PERCENT of ALL entries in his contest after 48 games! Matt says that little Henry Hasselbeck's strategy was picking the games based on mascots. He picked Duke, Kansas, Kentucky and Florida in his Final Four.
Where was this kid when I was picking MY (now busted) brackets!? http://benmaller.com/2011/03/nfl-stars-5-year-old-son-has-chance-to-win-ncaa-bracket-contest/
Duke coach Mike Krzyzewski says that he would turn down the Lakers YET AGAIN, if he was approached for the coaching gig! The last time Lakers coach Phil Jackson retired in 2004, they made a run at landing Krzyzewski and he turned it down then. Well, he's saying he would give them the SAME answer if the Lakers, who could be shopping for a new head coach if Phil goes through with his plan to retire after the season, decided to call him again. He said, "I've never thought of ever leaving Duke for another school but there were three serious times where I almost left to go to the pros."
With his Blue Devils now officially out of the running for the championship this year, Coach K has plenty of off-season time to probably think twice about all of that…
Krzyzewski was offered a five-year, $40 million dollar deal the LAST time the Lakers were trying to sway him around the time of the 2004 NBA draft. His net worth is listed at $12 million bucks... http://www.fannation.com/truth_and_rumors/view/274571-krzyzewski-would-spurn-lakers-again#ixzz1HXweo8K8
New York Rangers star Brandon Prust has been outed as a womanizer by the NY Post! They're claiming that his girlfriend found out about a fling he had with "Gossip Girl" star Michelle Trachtenberg from reading a gossip column! She bawled when she heard of the news of Michelle and the fact that he's also had lots of fun with other women around the Big Apple!
Brandon, Brandon, Brandon... you gotta be smarter with your high-sticking! http://benmaller.com/2011/03/nhl-star-caught-cheating/
After learning that Tiger Woods is dating a wild child party girl, sources are saying that his ex-wife Elin is LIVID, leading her to slap him with the ultimatum: let her near our kids and you'll NEVER see them again!
The National Enquirer is reporting that she apparently went ballistic when she found out that his 22-year-old little flame, Alyse, was busted on a felony DUI charge a while back ago and is threatening to push for FULL custody if he brings her near them.
Mind you that yesterday, we learned that when Alyse was just a little kid neighbor of his, she used to make crayon drawings for Tiger as good luck charms for his golf tournaments, touting him as her "future boyfriend." So who knows? Maybe Elin shouldn't hate her TOO much--Alyse could at least teach the kiddos a thing or two about how to color with crayons! http://www.nationalenquirer.com/
Meanwhile, Tiger Woods' favorite mistress, Rachel Uchitel, turned to Facebook to find HER new man! The NY Post is reporting that she found Matt Hahn, a 26-year-old scrub football player at Penn State, and current insurance underwriter, by putting "the poke" to him (so to speak) on Facebook! They connected through e-mail and phone calls before actually meeting in Florida on New Year's.
Of his new lady love, Hahn says, "We developed feelings very fast" and said he wasn't disillusioned by Uchitel's decorated past adding, "I don't judge anybody."
In all fairness, Matt, you really can't when, in your illustrious four year career as a running back for the Nittany Lions, you rushed for a total of 134 yards and 1 touchdown… http://benmaller.com/2011/03/tiger-woods-mistress-finds-new-man-on-facebook/
How crazy is this? The wacky soccer committee in Qatar is looking for a way to keep players cool during the 2022 World Cup, so they're developing an artificial cloud! It would be a remote controlled cloud, positioned over the field to provide shade from the sun! The engineering department from Qatar University has already unveiled their design for this "artificial cloud" all to the tune of $500,000 bucks!
Mankind can invent THIS but can't seem to invent a way to get the Pittsburgh Pirates into the playoffs?? http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/world_cup/67540/artificial-cooling-cloud-in-development-for-qatar-world-cup.html
Alright guys, keep your tongues in your mouths, but guess who actress Brooklyn Decker has a girl crush on? If you're not familiar with Brooklyn's work,( just think Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition cover girl, the girl who had her swimsuit PAINTED on, and the same chick in the yellow bikini who came out of the water in that Jennifer Anniston/Adam Sandler movie, "Just Go With It.") Anyway, she has the "girl hots" for ESPN darling, Erin Andrews! She took to Twitter to proclaim her admiration saying, "Oh my gosh. My girlcrush/foxy lady tweeted me! I heart Erin and her high sports IQ."
Yep, she used "heart" as a verb…fitting…http://twitter.com/ErinAndrews/status/50667631715434496
Apparently, Mexico's government offices have been having some issues with the guys there acting just a bit too chauvinistic! Mexico's interior ministry had to actually step in and distribute a guide called, "The Manual for the Non-Sexist Use of Language" to reduce the sexist behavior of the federal public workers! The manual seeks to reduce comments that enforce sexual stereotypes, such as, "If you want to work, why did you have children?" or (my personal favorite) "You're prettier when you keep quiet."
It also seeks to avoid referring to women in terms of possession, such as "Pedro's wife."
And finally…
Oh, how humanity continues to amaze me. One girl ends up losing her weave, while another one parted with a fake arm from a mannequin during a melee at an H&M store in Philly!
Ladies! I mean I'm ALL about doing ANYTHING to score a deal on a dress or be THE one to do ANYTHING to grab the last shoes on the rack, but really?
The best irony in all of this is the fact that the brawl ensued near mannequins wearing "Knot Violence" t-shirts…
Check on the video for yourself here... http://deadspin.com/#!5785092/one-girl-lost-a-weave-while-another-parted-with-a-fake-arm-during-an-hm-brawl-in-philly
And THAT'S my "Jock Itch!"
J
