Spotlight Shines on the Bully
He has been a fixture in the schoolyard for as many years as the schoolyard itself. Each year he takes on a different face and a different personality. Sometimes he is actually a she.
It's the bully.
While children have been victimized by the supposed tough-guy, in recent years cases have been more and more serious. In the last 12 months, authorities have traced three childhood suicides to bullies.
The increased use of text messaging, facebook and other social networking has only made the problem worse.
Today in Washington D.C. the United States Department of Education will sponsor a summit to focus on the problem, with teachers and parents adding their support. Those who deal with bullies on a daily basis say it's crucial for counselors and educators to know how to treat the problem, and equally as important for parents to recognize that their children are victims, or even the bully himself.
"It's more a matter of posturing." said Tanna Lazaroff, principal and counselor of the Denton area Trinity Charter School. "They are actually victims of very low self self esteem themselves, the bullies are. They will pick a victim so to speak. It's somebody they feel like they can intimidate."
And they often do, forcing a timid victim to tears. Lazaroff says many of her students have issues that lead to bullying and her staff is forced to handle the intimidation often. She says parents need to teach their children to stand their ground, though violence is not an answer.
"You don't want to make them mad. But on the other hand you've to look them in the eye and give them the message, 'You know what? You're wasting your time with me. You need to pick on somebody else because this won't work with me."
Humor is another out, making light of the situation and often defuse a bully. If you suspect your child is the victim of a bully and are not sure how to handle it, Lazaroff says you need to contact the school and ask to speak with the principal or a counselor.
By L.P. Phillips
