How to start a mental health conversation with your children

SAN FRANCISCO (CBS SF) -- Between the pandemic and the challenges of school and life, there's a mental health crisis among children in the U.S. Doctors say it's something parents need to discuss with their kids.

A survey from Nationwide Children's On Our Sleeves program shows a majority of parents -- 93 percent of those asked -- know it's important to talk to children about mental health. But more than half need help knowing how to start the conversation.

Pediatric psychologist Dr. Ariana Hoet directs On Our Sleeves. Its mission is to break the stigma and provide resources for families. This month, they're launching Operation: Conversation.

"It's all about teaching adults how to have conversations with children, conversations in general, building the habit, but also conversations that are difficult," Dr. Hoet said. "So, how to talk about their mental health if you're worried about them, how to talk about current events."

 On Our Sleeves has tips to start the conversation and keep it going, and for problem solving and giving advice to kids.

"Every day, a time when there's no distractions, maybe dinner time, in the car ride, at bedtime - asking open ended questions about a child's day," Dr. Hoet said. "What was the best part of your day? Is there something bothering you right now?"

Zenniere Bowry-Thomas makes it a priority to talk with her children about their thoughts and feelings. She asks them to say a highlight and lowlight of their day.

"I started having those conversations at night with both my son and daughter, and I found that asking those specific questions got a little bit more out of them versus, 'Yes, Mom, it was a fine day,'" Bowry-Thomas said.

Her family has had to tackle difficult conversations from the pandemic to racism.

"When you are trying to stay healthy, you have to take care of your heart and you also have to take care of your brain and your mental health," she said.

Bowry-Thomas also models for her children that it's OK to express emotions.

Click to find more information about Operation Conversation