Lewis Black Goes To Vegas

Comedian Lewis Black, a regular contributor to "The Daily Show With Jon Stewart" with his weekly "Back in Black" segment, performed Sept. 26, 2006, at the MGM Grand Hotel/Casino in Las Vegas. His HBO special, "Lewis Black: Red White & Screwed," will be released on DVD Oct. 3.

Lewis Black, who is also an author and playwright, was born in Washington, D.C., on Aug. 30, 1948, and raised in Silver Spring, Md. He is a graduate of the Yale School of Drama, and his television acting credits include "Homicide" and "Mad About You." In 2001, he received the American Comedy Award for "Best Male Stand Up."

Lewis Black's memoir, "Nothing's Sacred," was published in 2005, though he hesitates to call it a true memoir. He told one interviewer, "Essentially, it's how I got to my point of view. One could call it a memoir of sorts if I had a real memory. It's more like a blender."

A Lewis Black quote: "Candy corn is the only candy in the history of America that's never been advertised. And there's a reason. All of the candy corn that was ever made was made in 1911."

Lewis Black on his political views: "I do have certain feelings. My feeling is that whoever is in charge, I want him out."

A Lewis Black quote: "In my lifetime, we've gone from Eisenhower to George W. Bush. We've gone from John F. Kennedy to Al Gore. If this is evolution, I believe that in 12 years, we'll be voting for plants."

Lewis Black on the holidays: "Let's face it, Americans are fat all year round, but the holidays are when we really hit our stride. And you can bet the food we eat will be just as unhealthy as the families we're forced to visit."

A Lewis Black quote: "These ballot initiatives remind us that America is the land where people are free to dream whatever they want, so long as that dream doesn't make Midwesterners feel icky!"

Lewis Black on the "duck and cover" advice offered to schoolchildren in the '50s. (If the atom bomb hits, crawl under your desk and cover your head): "We are talking about a fireball from hell, and these morons had me hiding under wood -- under kindling, for God's sake! I might as well have been a rump roast in an oven."

Lewis Black on chemical warfare: "The folks who told us we could protect ourselves from a nuclear attack by hiding under our desks are the same jackasses who just told us that we could protect ourselves from a chemical attack with duct tape. Yeah, if you had enough to wrap yourself in, you could suffocate before the chemicals got to you."

Lewis Black on the environment: "It's ridiculous that we still have a hole in the ozone layer. We have men, we have rockets, we have Saran Wrap -- FIX IT! And don't come back until you do."

Lewis Black on the Northeast Blackout of 2003: "A week ago today, the Northeast experienced the biggest blackout in history. And since then, everyone's been sharing their stories of how they got through the blackout. And I'd just like to say to them: SHUT UP! ... Wow, you survived a blackout. You're made of stronger stuff than ice cream."

Lewis Black on the new millennium: "The new millennium sucks! What a disappointment! What's the difference between the old millennium and the new millennium? Nothing! It's the same load of crap with a '2' in the front."

Lewis Black on the weatherman: "What does the word 'meteorologist' mean in English? It means 'liar.' "

Lewis Black on nutrition: "Never eat anything that can eat you back!"

Lewis Black on solar-powered cars: "Man, these things are so ugly. They are powered by humiliation."

Lewis Black acknowledges a special celebrity landmark: "This past week marked the 25th anniversary of the death of Elvis Presley. How do I know? Because nobody will let me forget!"