11 Ways Living Like "Mad Men" Could Kill You

New York City, circa 1963: Sweet cars, gorgeous clothes, martini-fueled oyster feasts in the middle of the day. Fabulous, no doubt, but really, really unhealthy. Here are eleven ways living the "Mad Men" life could kill you.

In "Mad Men," Jon Hamm's character, Don Draper, indulges in some recreational drugs and public sex with his hippie lady-friend. His wife, oblivious, waits patiently at home. In the modern world, unprotected sex can lead to all kinds of nasty business, including HIV infection.

Big "business" lunches like this one, complete with oysters, alcohol and cheesecake, are common in "Mad Men." And so are the consequences. In this episode, ad exec Roger Sterling vomits up his power lunch after returning to the office.

What was it, exactly, that caused Roger Sterling to throw up his power lunch in front of clients? Was it the oysters? The drinks? The cheesecake? The cigarette smoke?

What would you say if you saw your child with a dry cleaning bag over her head? Probably not what Betty Draper said: "If the clothes from that dry cleaning bag are on the floor of my closet, you're going to be a very sorry young lady."

These days, parents are a bit more attuned to the suffocation risks posed by the plastic bags, along with the dangers posed by other household items.

No doubt it's unwise to bring a lawn mower into the office in the first place, but to encourage a drunk secretary to take it for a test drive is asking for trouble. In this scene, the employees of Don Draper's ad agency are splattered in blood from the foot of an unlucky co-worker.

Betty Draper was sober when she crashed the car into the tree - apparently she was having a psychosomatic problem involving cramping in her hands. But if her kids had been wearing seatbelts - not widely in use at the time - they wouldn't have been thrown to the floor of the car.

Peggy doesn't quite know what do make of the vibrating undergarment in this scene - and is horrified upon discovering just what part of the body it stimulates.

Like many women of her era, Betty is a bit in the dark about her body. We're not saying that being out of touch with yourself will lead to becoming pregnant and not knowing it until you're about to deliver, or land you in an institution for a spell, but hey - that's what happened to Peggy Olsen.

The "Mad Men" think nothing of calling in co-workers for a stiff drink.

Thing is, drink hard-core every day, like poor Freddy Rumsen, and you might just get to the point where you lose control of things - including your bladder.

Don Draper looks suave with his cigar, but imagine working in an office that reeks of tobacco smoke. Actually, you don't even need to reach back to the 1960's to remember that - after all, smoking bans didn't gain much traction until the late 1980's.

Living the "Mad Men" lifestyle wasn't just bad for your health - the planet didn't fair well either.

In this famous scene, the Draper family, having just finished a picnic, get ready to leave. Don Draper tosses an empty can into the trees and flowers, and Betty shakes the picnic blanket, scattering more litter onto the grass.

Gone are the bad old days when drunk drivers could just pay a fine and be on their way, like Don Draper in this scene.

Enough said?