10 offbeat alarm clocks to wake a heavy sleeper
No one loves an alarm clock. But if you've missed more than a few morning meetings, you may be ready for one you love to hate.
For some folks, a radio or that traditional beep might not be enough to stop them from hitting the snooze button. From our friends at Health.com, here are 10 real alarm clocks that use nightmarish methods to rouse - or at least seriously annoy - heavy sleepers.
Wake Up, Work Out Alarm Clock
The last thing you may want to do is pump iron before breakfast. That's too bad, if you set this 1.5-pound dumbbell clock ($35, gadgetsandgear.com).
It will shut off only after you've done 30 bicep curls.
What's more, it has internal motion censors too--so you can't cheat!
Blender Alarm Clock
Do clocks with calming, beach-scape sounds have you dreaming through your scheduled alarm?
Ditch the vacation noise for a cacophony of churning Styrofoam and absurd jingles being played simultaneously by this retro-style blender ($75, bimbambanana.com).
Nothing says "welcome to the real world" better than this.
Clocky
Addicted to your snooze button? Here's your cure.
This cute, wheeled timekeeper ($39, nandahome.com) rolls and leaps, from up to 3 feet, off your nightstand after one snooze. What's worse, it does so while beeping random patterns and hides until you hunt it down.
It's safe to say you won't be catching any z's catching this clock.
BanClock
They say time is money, and the BanClock ($76, audiocubes.com) takes this maxim to heart.
It has a time display like the national debt ticker, and you have to feed it hard-earned wages (a coin of any currency will do) to make it shut up.
Twist Equation Clock
Early-morning math: Is there a worse combo? We can't think of one.
When this alarm clock ($15, thinkgeek.com) goes off, the screen that normally shows the time will display a plus or minus sign. You have to twist the dials to create an equation that makes sense before you can turn it off.
Kim, the Talking Clock
Are you dreaming that robots are taking over the planet? Nope, that's just Kim, the talking alarm clock ($40, uncommmongoods.com).
She comes with gold metallic hair, a green speaker mouth, and a humanoid, robotic voice - but not a standard time display. (Press her silver nose and she'll tell you the time.)
When it's time to get up, she'll flash her red eyes at you while crowing like a rooster. Press her nose and she'll be quiet.
Puzzle Alarm Clock
Sometimes all you need is a little push to pop out of bed, and this clock ($22, dannabananas.com) will do the trick.
When the time comes, the clock launches three puzzle pieces into the air. You must return all three pieces to their matching holes before you can shut off the alarm.
Cross your fingers as you fall asleep, hoping the pieces don't fall behind your dresser or roll under your bed.
Clockman
If the only thing that will get you out the door in the morning is some serious nagging, Clockman ($69, japantrendshop.com) is for you. This chatty clock refuses to shut up, even after you get out of bed.
He'll greet you at your desired time, sing while you get dressed, and even yell if you anger him.
While Clockman speaks only Japanese for now, his wake-up-and-get-going message isn't lost in translation.
Laser Target Alarm Clock
Just what you've been waiting for: A chance to improve your hand-eye coordination while still half asleep.
When the alarm on the Laser Target clock ($25, baronbob.com) sounds, ex-sleepers must hit the bull's eye with a handheld laser remote to silence it.
To make it even more challenging, place the target in different parts of the room each night.
Sonic Boom With Super Shaker
If the four alarms you scheduled to go off 10 minutes apart wake your neighbors but not you, you might want to try this noisy clock ($43, sonicalert.com); it has a 113-decibel alarm - about as loud as a jackhammer.
And if the volume alone won't do it, the red flashing lights and accompanying bed-shaker unit (which goes beneath your mattress) should deliver the full sensory message that grave danger awaits unless you get out of bed.