Loathing Heather Mills

You either love her or you hate her but the chances are that if you are British and you have ever heard her or seen her - you probably hate her. Heather Mills - the ex-Mrs Paul McCartney - is our latest willing export across the Atlantic. We loathe her - I mean really, really loathe her.

It has been such a long time since our country's collective venom has been directed towards one small person. On the surface she seems nice enough. Blonde, quite pretty, once a model in fact. One legged after a road accident, surely worthy of our sympathy and quite a good dancer.

But we still hate her. It's not just because she divorced a blessed Beatle either - I couldn't care less about that - or that she used to be an 'adult star' - we are not that prudish anymore.

No, it has to do with every time she opens her mouth and what comes out of it when she does! This woman does not know the meaning of the word dignity.

I am sure you heard all about her messy public divorce from Paul? He wanted to extricate himself from this unfortunate relationship as quickly and as quietly as he could. Not just for the sake of their small daughter Bea, but, I suspect, because he felt a little foolish and embarrassed by this obvious, blundering mistake.

You see he had been well and truly warned, by family and close friends, but chose his own path. Their unhappy union lasted just 4 years and Heather did not go quietly. In fact she took every single opportunity she could to tell the world how awful her life had become.

She likened herself to Princess Diana, and even the unfortunate parents of the missing little girl, Madeline McCann. All we lacked was her own personal account of coming under sniper fire in Bosnia. Her final payout was 48.7 million dollars- not bad money for a woman who has yet to display any real bankable talent. I suspect we have not heard the last of her though. Unless we can raise enough money to persuade her to shut up and go away!
By Petrie Hosken