How communities can help raise strong and compassionate boys

As the Me Too movement works to give women and girls a greater voice, it is also bringing new attention to how boys are raised, and the pressures they face. 

"The basic understanding of boys' natures is off base. I think we don't really perceive them as relational and emotional creatures," Michael Reichert said Tuesday on "CBS This Morning." 

Reichert, a psychologist, is sharing how parents and communities can help raise compassionate and strong boys, pushing them to "get boyhood right – perhaps for the first time." He's out with a new book, "How To Raise A Boy: The Power of Connection to Build Good Men."  

"What we know is that, you know, our human brains are wired to connect and our emotions are a critical part of how we relate to the world, how we understand ourselves," he said. "So getting that right is fundamentally important, I think, for building good men."

Cultural norms – like "be tough" or "man up" –  conditions boys and cuts them off from their human natures, particularly in relationships, Reichert said.

"George Orwell, the British writer, had this wonderful quote: 'He wears a mask and he grows to fit it.' And I think that … there's this idea of the mask of masculinity that boys have to hide behind or they are vulnerable to being badly treated," Reichert said.

Reichert said the Me Too movement has changed the way people raise boys "dramatically" and "in a very positive way."

"I think the women's movement in general has opened up the possibilities for us to reconsider manhood and masculinity," he said, adding, "I think there's a whole new understanding of how to get along with people and how to hold on to our hearts that's happening for boys now." 

Reichert, who leads an emotional literacy program at a boys' school outside Philadelphia, said 40 to 50 boys show up voluntarily to discuss difficult emotional topics.

"They have no trouble doing it. If we build it, they will come," Reichert said.

His advice for parents is to put aside anxieties or concerns about parenting boys and "simply follow their lead" – "indicating to them that we love being with them … they're delightful to us and we're willing to go where they go, whatever it might be without modifying things," he said. "That's a fundamental skill in building a relationship and strengthening a connection."