As Coloradans sit down for Thanksgiving dinner, managing expectations can relieve stress
Between family dynamics, cross-country travel and expensive shopping, the holidays can take a toll on your mental health. As Coloradans prepare to sit down for Thanksgiving dinner, managing expectations is key to regulating stress.
"Acknowledge it," says Gabrielle Blickley, Licensed Clinical Social Worker from HCA HealthONE Mental Health and Wellness Center. "This is an expectation that I have. We [have to] talk about that. If we don't talk about expectation[s], they're not [going to] be met. Sometimes those are tough conversations. 'Hey, I have an expectation that A, B, and C is [going to] happen.' If they don't, then voicing, 'Hey, you know, I wanted this to happen, and it didn't.' Naming things can be really powerful."
Unmet needs aren't the only battles people fight during this time. Many have lost a parent, a grandparent, or a loved one, who was a part of the holiday gathering. That absence can appear as grief. But you can find ways to acknowledge they're not here.
"Maybe you set a place for them at the Thanksgiving dinner table or you cook their favorite dish," says Blickley. It's good to find "ways to memorialize them and not just be silent. Because when we're silent around grief, that's when it, kind of, eats away at our insides."
"They say leave religion and politics, maybe, outside of the dinner table," says Blickley. "And I agree with that this time around especially."
Families are noticeably polarized after the 2024 presidential election. "We have to acknowledge it as well," she tells us. "But maybe not at the Thanksgiving [dinner] table." She suggests avoiding political talk around an extended family where you already know beliefs and stances differ. "That's [going to] lead to further frustration and a lack of understanding."
A recent loss, the stress of wanting to make things perfect, and the cost of not only food but almost everything can sometimes be overwhelming.
Blickley says, "A lot of times we have this idea of what we want the holidays to look like and our expectations going into them. That can be a lot of driving force around the stress and anxiety."