Bernstein: It's Silly Season For Local TV
By Dan Bernstein--
CBSChicago.com senior columnist
(CBS) I sat in on some of these regular conference-room gatherings years ago, and I'd love to hear one of them today at any of Chicago's network-affiliated television stations: the morning news meeting on the day of a Blackhawks Stanley Cup Final home game.
I'm sure times have changed -- at least the haze of cigarette smoke already at 8 a.m. replaced by the chomps of nicotine gum and the oddly soothing clatter of wire-service printers long silenced -- but the essence is the same: a fidgety news director and overworked executive producer laying out the plan for the day for the loosely assembled team of writers, reporters, editors and maybe even an anchor, considering assignments and logistics over Styrofoam cups of bad coffee.
Instead of hashing out coverage of the usual grimness of gang shootings and governmental budget infighting, Hawks days like this mean TV news teams work to become part of the party, apparently fearful that they'll lose eyes and ears if not appropriately branded and celebratory.
Hard-bitten newsies can go all squishy when glomming onto the happy-town sports vibe, even in a top-three media market. Whatever data they have collected from previous seasons and their focus groups and surveys must say it's good business to pick up the pom-poms, and the army of camera crews rolls out.
The early live shot from outside the arena is a must, because later there is going to be a game there. If this includes some recent grumbling from the head coach after morning skate, all the better.
There will be the ticket story, with warnings intoned about counterfeit scammers trying to cash in. One local broker -- preferably one already advertising on the station -- will be interviewed about prices and demand, and a season-ticket holder will describe his or her personal conflict over whether to attend the game or sell the seats to help pay for grandma's kidney transplant.
Anyone connected to the team must be mined for some maudlin, human-interest piece. The more the better. Did the zamboni driver lose a finger in a recent gardening accident? Perhaps the scoreboard operator has overcome an unfortunate bout of eczema, the team's bus driver was briefly homeless after a sinkhole swallowed his condo or the sixth defenseman has an uncle in the Moldovan military stationed in some remote area that requires he traverse a perilous mountain range to watch the games, dodging both sexually aggressive goats and crossfire from warring tribal factions.
And a guy painted a wall! Can't miss that! It's paint -- on a wall!
No fan superstition is too insignificant to merit coverage, either. Here's one man with his lucky arrangement of his own teeth that have fallen out over the years. This suburban woman will only eat liverwurst sandwiches once the playoffs begin. And this kid already got a face tattoo of the Cup that says "Blackhawks 2015 Champions"! How crazy is that?
Any possibility of pursuing stories that could harsh the buzz is to be forgotten, too. Ignore anything troubling or potentially distasteful even if the persistent details cry out for investigation. This time of year is about the complicity of maintaining the athlete-as-hero myth. Because it's the Cup!
Star turns, too, for people in bars, now the the hallmark of playoff hockey in Chicago. There's nothing more interesting or informative, apparently, than fat white people in red shirts saying "Wooooooo!" And this staple is for every newscast, all day.
Pregame, it's "Let's go 'Hawks! They're gonna win! Wooooooo!!" Postgame, it's "The 'Hawks won! Wooooooo!!" Both are mandatory, as is the couple with their kid in the Patrick Kane jersey, the confused out-of-towners, the defiant opposing fans and the woman who shaved "Hossa" into the fur of her miserable cat.
The sports anchor will be live once again at the rink tonight, glum after a loss and giddy after a win, because he or she must project to being a big fan, too, lest some assumed connection with the viewer be lost.
All across the city today, it's about using the airwaves to both reflect and amplify excitement over sports. TV news is entertainment, and the circus is back in town.
Dan Bernstein is a co-host of 670 The Score's "Boers and Bernstein Show" in afternoon drive. Follow him on Twitter @dan_bernstein and read more of his columns here.
