Baffoe: Let's Mock People Blaming Jay Cutler
By Tim Baffoe-
(CBS) Jay Cutler could cure cancer and would still not win people over because of his lack of warmth and fuzziness. Going into Sunday's playoff-deciding game vs. Green Bay there were a significant amount of people actively rooting against the Bears quarterback merely to have some shred of self-satisfaction as more important than a Bears win and trip to the postseason.
Unfortunately for those weird, sad people, Cutler did not play badly. But, hey, never let results get in the way of a forced narrative, right? As you, the rational Bears fan, lick your wounds from a bitter loss and realization of the end of a season, at least take satisfaction in knowing you are not as dumb as the following people.
Culter.
Culter.
Culter.
McNown.
McNown.
McNown.
McCowan.
McCowan.
McCowan.
Jeffries.
So much going on here. First, how often do you see somebody use "God" but not the expletive afterward? Usually you'll get a "Gosh dangit" or a "God d**n it," but not a hybrid. Fascinating choice. Also, after careful consideration to not curse, we get the misspelling "DANGET." This tweet could be studied in a linguistics class for days.
It's nice that they let you have Internet access at the home.
Because then zero Cutler haters would question his heart or dedication if he did, right?
I have yet to hear a player on the Bears offense question Cutler's leadership, a very unquantifiable concept that people invoke when they don't really have an argument. In fact, every Bears offensive player does nothing but back Jay. Perhaps the media hasn't been asking questions about leasership, though.
The McCown Nation is a puppet regime that used to be the People's Republic of Orton.
I like how you're not afraid to have an avatar that suggests you'll cut your boyfriend into pieces and use him as chum.
Luckily very few people care what you say.
Dudes named Gage want a 35-year-old journeyman quarterback that was recently working at a high school! Make it so!
Kinda sucks you rock that sorta mustache.
I can't get over the Urlacher jersey mirror selfie.
A bit closer to the guardrail next time.
Not the historically bad defense. Not getting back arguably the best quarterback in the game. Nope. It's that they played against a quarterback who is going to willingly get paid a lot of money in 2014.
¡Ay, caramba! ¡Muchos estupidos!
"Coach, Jay had a 148.3 quarterback rating at one point in the fourth quarter. Why'd you pull him?"
"Well, I consulted that guy on Twitter that doesn't know my name, so…"
And then the Packers would have less of the touchdown things and Bears win and stuff.
No, see, you're not a Bears fan then. You're a petty bro from Schaumburg who likes Scotty McCreery.
But freshwater lake fish don't feed on mammal flesh. Bro, do you even ichthyology?
Josh McCown would've prevented that 4th and 8 Packers game-winning touchdown.
Oh, I love when my prejudices get comfortably proven, too.
This is 100% correct.
But is either one Russell Westbrookian?
If there's one good thing about the Bears losing yesterday it's that people like this will have to find something else to sound incredibly stupid about. At least until the Bears put the franchise tag on Cutler.
