What Is That Thing That Cam Newton Is Wearing?

Look at this photo:

It was taken this weekend at Coachella and posted to Cam Newton's Instagram page (Coachella, through my research, appears to be some sort of a music festival for which I have very little knowledge).

Look at that thing he's wearing! Did he start a fight with the wrong set of drapes? Was it... a tragic wallpapering accident? Why is he dressed like an interior decorating experiment gone horribly wrong?

These are all questions that had become problematic, even resulting in lost sleep. Where have I seen that look before? I was being driven crazy by the unplaceable familiarity of Cam's threads.  And then it hit me: on Saturday afternoon, I attended the 16th birthday party of a family friend. Nothing wild, just a low-key, family-oriented celebration.  Why do I bring that up? Well, guess who was wearing Cam's outfit?

Like, every single one of the birthday girl's friends, that's who! Here are some stock photos of Cam's look via a Google Image search:

May you attack every day with as much confidence as Cam Newton wearing a floral romper.

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