Book excerpt: "Black Buck" by Mateo Askaripour
Brooklyn author Mateo Askaripour's debut novel, "Black Buck" (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt), is a comical tale of one ambitious Black man's experience on a tech startup's sales team.
Read an excerpt below:
There's nothing like a Black man on a mission. No, let me revise that. There's nothing like a Black salesman on a mission. He's Superman, Spiderman, Batman, and any other supernatural, paranormal, or otherwise godlike combination of blood, flesh, and brains. He can't die. Don't believe me? MLK. Yes, Martin Luther King Jr. was a Black salesman. In the same way used-car salesmen hawk overpriced hunks of metal that break down once an unsuspecting customer drives off the lot, our man ML to the goddamn K was a salesman to the highest degree.
Not only did he sell black people on the vision of a unified America, but he also sold the United States Supreme Court, which at the time contained nine white men — the hardest decision makers for any Black man to convince. MLK, Malcolm X, James Baldwin, Jean-Michel Basquiat, and Frederick Douglass were all salesmen. Hell, Nina Simone, Rosa Parks, Harriet Tubman, and every other Black woman who achieved any leap of success was a saleswoman. Oprah "hide a BMW under your seat" Winfrey is a saleswoman. You get the point. Each and every one of these people was selling something more precious than gold: a vision. A vision for what the world could look like if millions of people were to change their minds — the hardest thing to change.
How do I fit into all of this? When will I shut up and get to the point? Don't worry, I'm getting there. I am a Black man on a mission. No, I am a Black salesman on a mission. And the point of this book — which I'm writing from my penthouse overlooking Central Park — is to help other Black men and women on a mission to sell their visions all the way to the top. So high up that I'll have to crane my neck, like one of those goofy White people in films deciding whether a superhero is a bird or a plane, just to catch a glimpse of them before they're out of sight. Whoosh! Bang! Poof! The great disappearing act of success. My goal is to teach you how to sell. And if I'm half the salesman every newspaper, blog, and hustler in New York City says I am, then you are in luck. With my story, I will give you the tools to go out and create the life you want. To overcome every seemingly impossible obstacle. To fix the game. Which game, you ask? We'll get there. But before we do, I'm going to ask you to do three things.
1. Let down your guard and open your mind to what I'm going to tell you. I know we're strangers right now. You're likely asking yourself why you should trust me. The good thing is that you already bought this book, so you trusted me enough to part with $26. I won't let you down.
2. Understand that I want all people to be successful, but in the same way that Starbucks can't just give out Mocha Frappuccinos to anyone who doesn't have $14, I can't help everyone. So, I am starting with Black people. If you're not Black but have this book in your hands, I want you to think of yourself as an honorary Black person. Go on, do it. Don't go don blackface and an afro, but picture yourself as Black. And if you want, you can even give yourself a fancy black name, like Jamal, Imani, or Asia.
3. Say, "Every day is deals day," and clap your hands. I know it's strange, but do it. And when you do, think of the number one thing you're working toward. It may be a new car, a promotion, someone's affection, or an expensive pair of shoes. Whatever it is, think of it and say, "Every day is deals day," and clap your hands as loud as you can. As you'll find out, every day is deals day. A day without deals is like a camel without humps; it doesn't exist.
From "Black Buck," copyright © 2021 by Mateo Askaripour. Reprinted by permission of Houghton Mifflin Harcourt. All rights reserved.
For more info:
- "Black Buck" by Mateo Askaripour (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt), in Hardcover, eBook and Audio formats, available via Amazon and Indiebound
- mateowrites.com