How to have open communication about money with friends, family

How to start discussions about personal finances with friends, family

MINNEAPOLIS — Money is an awkward topic.

A new Bankrate survey finds only 38% of U.S. adults say they are comfortable discussing their bank account balance with friends and family.

"We'd like to see money become a more open part of the conversation," said Ted Rossman, a Bankrate Senior Industry Analyst.

With so many people feeling the financial squeeze, Rossman has concerns about the lack of communication over money. 

"One of the things that happens is sometimes people want to help and they offer too much financial assistance and then it undermines their own financial security," said Rossman.

He also cites that many people have a hard time communicating freely about money with their spouse. That can lead to financial infidelity.

"We found that more than four in 10 people who are married or otherwise living with their romantic partner have kept or are keeping financial secrets from that person. Secret debt, secret spending, secret bank accounts," said Rossman.

But there is some hope. 

More than half of Gen Z adults said that they're comfortable talking about money with the people closest to them.

"With my like Gen Z friend groups, it's not that uncommon to talk about money. With family it's a little more taboo but for people my age, I think it's becoming more of the norm," said Katie Dinsmore, a visitor from New York City.

Those family members are taking notice.

"In part because the generation to follow is asking a lot of great questions about it and I'm a mother of that generation," said Maureen Walsh of Victoria.

For those looking to ease their anxiety over discussing finances, there are options.

"If it's your spouse, for instance, maybe set a monthly money date where you talk about bills that are due and other financial goals you want to accomplish in the coming year.

If you're really trying to hunker down and pay off your credit card debt, maybe you let that be known to your friend group that you want to cut back on some of the pricier extras for the time being," said Rossman.

In the end, talking about money is not about telling people how much you make but your relationship to it.

Rossman says it's important to take the stigma out of discussing money matters, especially with those we're close to.

Talking about your money goals and challenges may lead to helpful advice. If people know you are sticking to a budget, they'll better understand.

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