Report: Man Uses Raccoon To Start Breathalyzer Equipped Car; Raccoon Then Attacks Driver

By: Evan Jankens
@kingofthekc

This story is straight out of the movie "Tommy Boy" -- but could it be real? It appears not.

Remember the scene when Chris Farley and David Spade were rolling around in the car with what they thought was a dead deer in the back seat and it woke up and attacked the two?

That same kind of event took the Internet by storm -- but this time it was allegedly for real -- in San Diego, Calif.

A man who needed to blow into a Breathalyzer to start his car was too drunk to do so, according to a report. What he did next is almost unbelievable. According to what appeared to be a police report posted on Imgur, this guy somehow found a raccoon going through the garbage, captured it and then used the raccoon to blow into the Breathalyzer.

According to the report that was shared on Imgur, the raccoon became unconscious so the man left the raccoon in the car and drove off. A short time after, the raccoon woke up and started to attack the driver.

I'm not one to judge, but generally when you have a Breathalyzer on your steering wheel it's there because you haven't made the best decisions in the past. And this, I have to believe, would have been this man's rock bottom. It would also have been the raccoon's.

It's a fun tale, but the San Diego Union-Tribune says it didn't happen despite the Internet hype. "I called police records, and while they were highly entertained, they confirmed (the story) is absolutely a hoax," said 1st. Lt. Savannah Frank, a public affairs officer at Camp Pendleton, per the Union-Tribune.

We do to, too, Shannon, we do, too.