Fan Tries To Outscore Denver Nuggets -- By Eating More Chicken Nuggets
By: Will Burchfield
@burchie_kid
This is nothing if not ambitious.
A Cleveland Cavaliers fan tried to eat more chicken nuggets than the Denver Nuggets scored points in the two teams' game on Wednesday night.
Why? Because the #MeVsNuggets challenge.
Allow our brave contestant to explain.
For those unaware, #MeVsNuggets is apparently a #CavsTwitter thing where you try to eat more chicken nuggets than the Nuggets score points
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 22, 2017
Before tipoff (dip-off?), Stephan solicited the help of the Cavs' defense, which was probably a bit of a prayer. Cleveland ranks 21st in the NBA in points against per game (106.6). Keep that in mind.
.@cavs gonna need you guys to play some great defense tonight #CavsNuggets #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
Then he mapped out his plan of attack. Preparation is everything.
#MeVsNuggets gameplan: get out to a quick start, build a lead, then hope to hang on in the second half. Also, not dying.
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
The first inkling of doubt seemed to creep into Stephan's mind when he sized up his task. Yeah, that's a lot of nuggets.
I can already tell this was a bad idea #MeVsNuggets pic.twitter.com/KjDqSNdIJO
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
Aside: Before you criticize Stephan's choice of Burger King chicken nuggets - peons in the chicken-nugget food chain - consider his reasoning.
If I'm going to ruin a restaurant's chicken nuggets for the rest of my life, I'll choose BK and not waste the money.
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
If this was a normal meal, I wouldn't have chose BK. Wendy's, McDonald's Chik-Fil-A all have better nuggets. This was quantity over quality
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
Very fair. Not to mention, BK nuggets are notoriously slim, making them arguably the least filling nuggets on the market. So Stephan made a financial decision and a pragmatic one. That's championship thinking.
Then again, he was beginning to rethink things just 20 minutes into the game.
#MeVsNuggets pic.twitter.com/p4ci8oceVe
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
First 20 went pretty easy, next 20 not as well. This is going to get ugly. #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
End of 1: Stephan 47, Nuggets 34, Cavs 31 #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
So assuming a 9:00 on-the-dot tipoff, Stephan knocked off 47 nuggets in the first 33 minutes. That's an impressive haul, to be sure. The worrisome part was that the other Nuggets were on pace for about 140 points.
That pace only increased in the second quarter. Stephan's, meanwhile, slowed down. I mean, c'mon -- it had to.
Hit a wall around 55. Might need a halftime of my own here soon. #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
The Denver Nuggets outscored Stephan's chicken nuggets 39-22 in the second quarter, securing a four-point lead at halftime. Stephan hoped to re-group during the intermission.
Nuggets 73, Stephan 69, Cavs 58 at half. Gonna try to get it tied up before the second half starts #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
But the Nuggets came out of the locker room with gusto and left Stephan in the dust.
To his credit, he kept on competing. That's what coaches want to see. Down big, and you're still diving on the floor for the loose ball.
At 73. No way I'm gonna take the win from the Nuggets. Playing for pride now. Aiming for 80 before I die. #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
Stephan made a momentary plea to the public, but this was his battle and his battle only. No shortcuts here.
Anyone want some chicken nuggets? I might know a guy looking to get rid of some. #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
He owned the loss shortly thereafter.
Tapping out at 82. Godspeed if you're still going. #MeVsNuggets pic.twitter.com/o5d1ZjVz5A
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
The Denver Nuggets ended up scoring 126 points, outscoring/out-eating Stephan by 44 points/nuggets. For Stephan, the combination of a great Nuggets offense - 111.5 points per game - and a poor Cavs defense was too much to overcome. One could say he bit off more than he could chew. Too much?
Too much.
Also, too full.
I'm too full to even go to sleep soon why did I do this for the game in Denver #MeVsNuggets
— Stephan Sharp (@StephanSharp) March 23, 2017
For Pistons fans interested in the #MeVsNuggets challenge, choose the matchup wisely. The difference between, say, 85 nuggets and 125 nuggets could literally be the difference between life and death.
Our suggestion? The Orlando Magic, who are second to last in the league in points per game (100.2) and who host Detroit twice more this season. In the teams' first two matchups, the Magic scored 82 and 98 points, respectively.
Would there be anything more gratifying than swallowing a chicken nugget at the buzzer as Nikola Vucevic throws up a brick? You'd be throwing up next, but you'd also be a winner.