Baffoe: Let's Mock Donald Sterling Apologists

By Tim Baffoe-

(CBS) That Los Angeles Clippers owner Donald Sterling is an abscess on humanity is not debatable. He is a Calvin Candie for our modern times with an extensive résumé of awfulness that most who follow the NBA have long been aware of but are only now calling for his head. He is a vile, bigoted man who says and does vile, bigoted things and has largely operated with immunity because he's rich, his money made from being a noble slum lord, and money tends to absolve or prevent repercussions.

But even the stinkiest of turds will always find someone to love him. Hell, Sterling actually has a wife — though whether it's him or his fortune that she cuddles with is up for debate.

It might surprise you, the not stupid reader, but a scumbag like Sterling will always attract a lecherous group of apologists, ranging from those who genuinely feel the guy has been wronged by a society that was better off during the days of Eisenhower to those who see Sterling as a microcosm of constitutional law gone awry. These are people who think there should be debate — not regarding a bad person's badness, but about how this reflects on their own sense of self worth. These are the "Hitler was a vegetarian and anti-smoker" and "Mussolini made the trains run on time" historians of Internet message boards and chain emails. These are almost entirely white people who are bothered by an awful white old man being called out.

So I say we call a few of them out, because making fun of stupid people on the Internet is fun. Yes, we examined a whole lot of stupid just last week, but sometimes the cup of dumb runneth over in a short time span. Shoutout to @marmolheater who collected a few of the following Twitter gems on Sunday and from whom I have plucked.

First up, I had my Monday morning commute spiced up by upstanding hero "Jimmy," a caller to The Mully and Hanley Show (18:40 mark he's on initially before being put on hold because his takes are too hot for the early morning hours, then returns at 21:20) who had to drop some truth bombs on the listening audience that had just had their minds poisoned by Rev. Jesse Jackson minutes earlier. Nuggets of love-it-or-leave-it freedoms like, "There were a lot of Union white people who died in that Civil War that never get acknowledged," Jesse Jackson is the "biggest racist in the world" and the Sterling phone recording "was a set-up" (and something about the "NCAACP"). Note, though, that Jimmy doesn't condone Sterling's words. He just doesn't like how white people get the lion's share of racist accusations and lack of Civil War appreciation. Just ain't right, Jimmy.

On to it:

#WelcomeToAmerica, where many, many Americans don't actually understand the Constitution they cloak themselves in to justify being cancers on the social fabric.

Not sure if the First Amendment covers red blazers and far off looks into the great cosmos, though.

See, Donald Sterling is a teacher, people. We can learn great things from him. He should speak to @MrOnePercentt's frat house of future slum lord owners.

Right? No lives were put in danger by any of this. There is the whole question of a man who controls the economic interests of many people being a bigot who believes in profiting from the work of people of color while seeing them as less-thans, but Donald Sterling didn't get anyone trampled.

Brian Battaglia of Tucson, Arizona, sociologist extraordinaire, is my spirit animal.

We've reached "slut shaming." Next stop on this never late train: "How can we vilify the President from this?"

We need to take all the money and separate it into two piles — "racist money" and "not racist money." Then people will know what money to possess. I bet a lot of people will still go for "racist money," though. Shame.

Oh, and Sterling-as-Obama donor is not true, and records show Sterling donated $4,000 that he found between his couch cushions to politicians in the early 1990s, as if it mattered anyway or that a member of one political party chastising someone who subscribes to that party is something that can't happen or something. This must be a partisan issue.

How dare he answer a question he was asked. Typical Obummer not standing up to left-wing media and saying, "Hey, Ima let you finish, but Keystone is the greatest political issue of all time!"

THE WORLD IS ABOUT ERUPT WITH RUSSIANS WHO KINDA HATE BLACK PEOPLE TOO.

Wait, that's still a thing? Wow. Really makes you think.

When you think about it, years of sexism and racism all packed into one 10-minute recording of a phone call to a guy's mistress who is half black, half Latino and in which he also sideswipes a man who for the better part of a decade was the face of the NBA, yeah, there is really no reason.

Racisitism is color-deaf.

Bigotry and hate is profitable, people. It's basic economics. Joke's on us. By punishing Sterling, we're working to only make him more money. But if we don't punish him, he'll just be a stigmatized billionaire who can buy and sell any of us anyway. Let's think this whole thing out before overreacting.

We will never reach a post-racial America until we have successfully categorized what people of color are allowed to say. And why isn't there a White Team Owner History Month?

There are millions of men who own professional sports teams and have a history of discriminatory business practices and treatment of employees, so why even bother. Just let the racism wash over you and accept it.

If there is one thing I can't stand, it's taking advantage of stupid people for personal gain.

You can follow Tim on Twitter @TimBaffoe.

In:
• Los Angeles Clippers
• NBA
• Racism
• Jesse Jackson
• Barack Obama