Keller @ Large: Republican presidential candidates shout over each other in disjointed debate
BOSTON - Did you know Joe Biden is responsible for rainy weekends, ants at your picnic and the Red Sox' wretched performance this season?
OK, the seven GOP presidential candidates onstage at the Reagan Library in Simi Valley, California Wednesday night didn't really add those to their laundry lists of Biden's alleged crimes, but perhaps only because they ran out of time. Early on in this exceptionally disjointed and poorly-moderated debate, the candidates took turns blaming our national problems on the incumbent. "Joe Biden doesn't belong on the picket line, he belongs on the unemployment line," concluded former Vice President Mike Pence.
Once that was established, the firehose was turned on the prohibitive frontrunner in the race, former President Donald Trump. He is "missing in action, he should be on this stage tonight. he owes it to you to defend his record where they added $7.8 trillion to the debt," said Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis. (DeSantis later took a shot from Pence for running up spending in Florida.)
And the party's designated Trump slagger, former New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie, came ready with canned goods. "Donald, I know you're watching. you can't help yourself, I know you're watching," he said into the camera. "And you're not here tonight not because of polls and not because of your indictments. You're not here tonight because you're afraid of being on this stage and defending your record.... You keep doing that and no one up here's gonna call you Donald Trump anymore, we're gonna call you Donald Duck."
(Yet another pol on the warpath against Disney, what gives?)
Trump's estranged former vice president actually came to his defense a couple of times; "despite what's said here today, we reduced illegal immigration and asylum abuse by 90%," Pence said at one point.
But for the most part, there was little distinguishing these candidates on the issues. At times, the dialogue was incomprehensible as they shouted over one another.
And the pressure to score a memorable line produced some low blows, like this whopper from former South Carolina Gov. Nikki Haley: "We have to secure the border. The way we do that is first, defund sanctuary cities. You see what's happening in Philadelphia right now, it's gotta stop." No evidence has emerged that migrants are behind recent looting in that city.
Remember the great Muhammad Ali's mantra about successful boxing - float like a butterfly, sting like a bee? He placed just as much emphasis on avoiding punches as he did on landing them.
In part because of a terrible format that didn't allow much interaction between the candidates, none of them showed much capacity to sidestep jabs and counterpunch effectively. Fans of these politicians may have come away thinking their man or woman did well, but here's betting uncommitted viewers struggled to see clear differences between them, and at times strained to even hear what they were saying as they talked over each other.
DeSantis kept touting his record as governor but had nothing to say when called out for overspending by Pence. Christie threw several jabs at Trump, but to what end? The problem for all seven candidates, all trailing Trump in the polls by a mile, is that he isn't there for them to sting.
No wonder they all pretty much came off as B-listers.
Fox News reportedly slashed its ad rates for this debate, apparently fearing a dud. They may have to give the ads away for the next one on November 8th.