Keller: How can you avoid talking politics around the holidays?
The opinions expressed below are Jon Keller's, not those of WBZ, CBS News or Paramount Global.
BOSTON - The election and the changing of power could be big topics at this year's holiday celebrations. But how do you keep the political drama from poisoning important relationships?
Most want to avoid political talk
Many of us are on edge these days, and politics has a way of pushing us over that edge. In a pre-Thanksgiving CBS News/YouGov poll, 71% said they would try to avoid talking about politics over the holiday.
"It makes sense that people are feeling a lot of feels right now," said Marblehead-based etiquette expert Jodi R.R. Smith, of Mannersmith Etiquette Consulting, who suggests political discussions should be avoided if you're sure they're going to be toxic. But, "We are allowed to talk about politics. If we stop talking about it, we can never come together on anything. The question is: Is this the time and place?"
How to avoid politics at holiday events
Smith advised planners of a fall wedding to insert language in the invitation and program politely requesting that differences be set aside to focus on the couple, and it worked.
But Boston etiquette expert Roseanne Thomas, of Protocol Advisors, suggested you have the right to reject unwanted political talk.
"You don't have to get involved if you don't want to. If you do, you listen respectfully; you kind of let them know that you've heard what they said; if you want to share your opinions, you do, but otherwise, you say 'OK, that's interesting,' and you move on," she said.
Her getaway line and Smith's are notably similar.
"'That's interesting, but do you know what I find fascinating?' And you can take the conversation, and move it somewhere else altogether," said Smith.
And if guests persist in talking politics?
"'If you'll excuse me,' and remove yourself from the situation," Smith said.
The experts say you always want to take the high road, even if that means politely walking away from a conversation or avoiding the gathering altogether. Send cookies and your regrets, advised Smith, and consider reconnecting when things cool down.
But, Thomas observed, political nerves are more frayed than ever, and people need to remember one thing before they engage: You are not going to change Uncle Bob's or Cousin Jane's mind over the egg nog.