Hurley's Picks: More Fraudulence From Roger Goodell Can't Distract From Week 8 NFL Slate
By Michael Hurley, CBS Boston
BOSTON (CBS) -- Roger Goodell wants to have his cake and eat it. Then he wants to get a new cake, eat that one, and have it, too. Then he wants to order four more cakes before telling the American public that he never had any cake, even though he's got chocolate crumbs all over his face.
That's essentially what can be gathered from this week's latest "DeflateGate" development, as the NFL filed a brief (not a very good word for a 59-page document, if you ask me) to the appeals court in New York as the league continues its dogged quest to take down Tom Brady for an equipment violation that may or may not have happened and may or may not have made the slightest impact on one half of a football game -- a game which was decided by 38 points.
I'd say it's embarrassing, but Goodell and the NFL are way beyond that point now.
The most two-faced aspect of the whole charade is that when Goodell does decide to speak publicly, he steps into the batter's box to hit softballs lobbed at him by Mike & Mike on ESPN Radio. It's like that scene in "Gladiator" when Russell Crowe steps into the Colosseum and has to fend off a charging tiger, except instead of a tiger, it's a bunny rabbit and a corgi puppy licking his toes and making him giggle. Adorable!
In that interview, Goodell said that the filing of the appeal is about one thing and one thing only: the power entrusted to the commissioner in the CBA.
If that were the case, then fine, but Goodell should perhaps realize that the power was granted to the commissioner because no commissioner in NFL history ever attempted to wield such autocratic power with regard to player discipline. His much more competent predecessors never had to go such lengths over this issue, because they never abused their power. But that's neither here nor there. Goodell wants his power, so he's appealing based on the letter of the law and the CBA.
"This is about our rights in the collective bargaining agreement," Goodell told the hounds. "That's all it is."
Except, well, that's not what the content of the appeal was about. The brief included extensive accusations about Tom Brady engineering a "scheme" to deflate footballs. It disregarded science. It brazenly stated that Brady was lucky to not have gotten a six-game ban, which he rightfully deserved, because he essentially committed the same violation as a player who takes masking agents to cover steroid use. It fails to identify the numerous failings by NFL employees from January through September that led to Judge Berman's decision, instead continuing to pile 100 percent of the blame and fault on Tom Brady.
None of that has anything to do with the CBA, or the power of the commissioner. It has to do with slamming Brady in public. Again.
It's pathetic.
Not to mention, the NFL hired two of the best lawyers money can buy to fight their battle, just a few months after Troy Vincent chastised the NFLPA for wasting money, time and resources on lawsuits when there are "players that are hurting."
Perhaps the latest filing will shed more light on just how overbearing and outrageous Goodell and the NFL have acted throughout the case. But then again, probably not.
In the meantime, I'll pick some football games. Because there's nothing Goodell can do to ruin football, it seems.
(Home team in CAPS; Wednesday lines)
NEW ENGLAND (-8) over Miami
It's tricky, because you never know how the Thursday games are going to play out. Plus the Dolphins are all hopped up on Mountain Dew, or whatever it is that Dan Campbell is feeding them, that they're definitely going to bring a high emotional level in Foxboro.
But ... let's not carried away. They're still the Dolphins. They have a new coach, but these are the same players who lost to the Jaguars and Bills. I really don't care at all about the offensive statistics they've been able to put up on the Titans and Texans. Those two teams might combine for five wins this season.
I know that the Patriots have allowed backdoor covers in consecutive weeks, but this is a game they should be able to win convincingly. (Though, Miami definitely has run more Oklahoma drills in recent weeks. So they've got that.)
Number of note: The average margin of victory in Thursday night games this year is nine points.
Kansas City (-5) over Detroit (in London)
I like to research these games, you know? Really do my homework, tear through some stats, read up on what the local reporters are saying, all of that. So I decided to Google "Jim Caldwell," because I don't understand how he's still employed. Here's the top result I got:
Love it. When you're 1-6, why make any changes? You don't amass a 14-25 record as a head coach post-Peyton Manning by changing what makes you great. Of course, the Lions then fired their offensive coordinator as well as two offensive line coaches the very next day. It's almost as if Jim Caldwell has no idea what's going on ...
BALTIMORE (-3) over San Diego
I suppose someone has to win this game, right? Yeesh. The Ravens are 1-6, and the Chargers are 2-5. Against the spread, the Ravens are 1-5-1. The Chargers are 2-5.
When the Chargers lose, they do so by an average of eight points. When the Ravens lose, they do so by an average of five points. Their one win came by a field goal.
The Chargers have been outscored by 33 points on the year. The Ravens have been outscored by 27.
Covers.com tells me that San Diego is 0-6 against the spread when facing teams with losing records, and that the Ravens are 0-5 against the spread when facing losing teams.
What I'm trying to tell you is that this is a complete waste of a pick and there's no reason to like either team. Don't watch this football game.
Tennessee (+4) over HOUSTON
Ditto.
Ban the AFC South.
ATLANTA (-7.5) over Tampa Bay
This is legitimately the most difficult line of the week. The Falcons just beat the Titans 10-7. Ten-to-seven. When your quarterback throws for 250 yards and your running back goes over 100, and when you gain 122 more yards than your opponent, it seems impossible to only score 10 and to only win by a field goal. Yet ... 10-7.
Then you have the Bucs, who got Kirk Cousins'ed after opening up a 24-0 lead on the road. They most certainly did not like that.
The Bucs can stop the run, which means Devonta Freeman may not have a wild day, and which also means the game rests on Matt Ryan's shoulders. I don't like that.
But I also don't like the Bucs.
So I'm picking Atlanta.
You like that?! YOU LIKE THAT!
Minnesota (-1) over CHICAGO
The Vikings might be better than we give them credit for. And the Bears are undoubtedly worse than we give them credit for.
Arizona (-4.5) over CLEVELAND
There's something to be said about not letting one week's decision drag into the following week. But after picking Cleveland last week, only to see the Browns stumble their way to a six-point afternoon in St. Louis, I can't in my right mind say that the Browns will find much more success one week later.
Because their quarterback ran into a wall and got hurt.
ST. LOUIS (-8.5) over San Francisco
Again, the big line is scary, but until I see Colin Kaepernick prove capable of completing a simple 5-yard pass to a wide-open receiver, I'm going to stay away from the Niners.
The only reason to watch the 49ers this season has been to see whether the offense or the defense will put forth a more hilarious effort. Well, that, plus Jim Tomsula's mustache. That thing is something else.
— Michael Hurley (@michaelFhurley) October 23, 2015
New York Giants (+3.5) over NEW ORLEANS
The stupid Giants are going to win the stupid Super Bowl, aren't they? It's a ridiculous premise, sure, but isn't that what Giants Super Bowl memories are made from? Every four years, they are perfectly mediocre and then win a Super Bowl despite all logic and reason. It's just the Giants Way.
Right now, they're in a division where nobody else is really going to compete. They are a peak-and-valley kind of team that's capable of beating anyone on one night and losing in embarrassing fashion the next night. Eli Manning remains the Goofmaster General while still leading comeback drives. The only top-tier team in the NFC is Green Bay, and frankly Aaron Rodgers' squad does not look as good as last year's team. The Packers are certainly beatable.
So I'm just telling you now, here at the end of October, to just prepare yourself. The Giants will probably win a dumb Super Bowl. Because sports are stupid. (You should also turn down the brightness on your TVs, in case we have to see Tom Coughlin's face at Lambeau in January again.)
New York Jets (-2.5) over OAKLAND
I don't like the line. I'd prefer the home team that's coming off a 37-29 win get a little more respect, for the sake of making my job easier. But I like the Jets. They seem poised to channel the energy and frustration from the loss in New England and come out with their third road win of the year.
I do find it funny that both of these teams will be contending for a wild-card spot at the end of the year. That was not how most folks drew it up back in July.
PITTSBURGH (+1) over Cincinnati
For the sole fact that the Cincinnati Bengals will not improve to 7-0, I'm willing to put my faith in a one-legged Ben Roethlisberger. Had that man not essentially walked away from a motorcycle crash a few years ago, maybe my doubts would be stronger. But I actually feel like he took these last few weeks off just to throw people off the scent that he's indestructible.
Seattle (-6) over DALLAS
Yeah, so ... the Legion of Boom is a shell of what it once was. The Seattle secondary just lacks that aura they used to have where they could completely dominate games.
But they're still pretty good. And Matt Cassel is not.
Come Sunday night, Russell Wilson may not be the only quarterback being hunted by Greg Hardy. Watch your back, Matt.
Green Bay (-3) over DENVER
A very significant picture of the modern-day NFL was on display last week in Foxboro, when the No. 1 offense won comfortably against the league's top defense. Maybe 10 or 15 years ago, I would estimate that the better defense wins that matchup seven or eight times out of 10. But now? This is an offensive league, and thus the better offense is the team that will win more often than not.
Now, the Packers offense is far from prolific. They rank 12th in yards per game and fifth in points per game. But they're a stiffer challenge for that vaunted Denver defense than Cleveland ... Oakland ... Detroit ... Kansas City ... and Baltimore. Eventually, all of those back-breaking picks that Peyton Manning throws are going to actually break their back.
CAROLINA (-7) over Indianapolis
The wheels are off in Indy. The owner's fighting with the GM in the locker room. The coach still is somebody who cried after beating the Titans. The quarterback loves throwing picks. The "fake punt" remains the most hilarious play in NFL history. The team is good at nothing -- literally, nothing.
And yet, they might win the AFC South with a 6-10 record.
Ban the AFC South.
Thank you.
Last week: 10-4
Season: 50-53-2
Read more from Michael Hurley by clicking here. You can email him or find him on Twitter @michaelFhurley.