Great White Singer Wants To Apologize In Documentary Covering The Station Nightclub Fire

BOSTON (CBS) - It will be 13 years next February, which almost feels unreal to Station Nightclub fire survivor Mike Ricardi. The Worcester native was at the Great White show in West Warwick, R.I. that night to interview the band's front-man, Jack Russell, for his Nichols College radio show. Ricardi's co-host, friend, and fellow student Jim Gahan was by his side.

"He was a huge Great White fan so he really was looking forward to this more than anybody," Ricardi says.

Seconds into the show, pyrotechnics caught the stage on fire. Ricardi made it out with second degree burns. Gahan's body was later found just steps from the door. Over the years since, Ricardi has tried to process the pain. He even published a book about it this summer, called "Just A Thought Away". It tells the story of his friendship with Gahan, the tragedy of that night, and his attempts to move on.

"There's really no right answer," he says. "I guess you deal with it in your own way."

So Ricardi, for one, was ready to hear today's news that Jack Russell is ready to say he's sorry.

"Look what I did," Ricardi explains. "I wrote a book telling my story. I think he has the right to do that. There's probably a lot of things he wants to get off his chest. Whether it's to clear up, whether it's to seek forgiveness, whatever his intention is, he has the right to do that."

"I feel a guilt, this survivor's guilt," Russell admitted during an interview with a Portland, Oregon radio station. "Why did I get to live and so many other people didn't? I feel guilty for people coming to see me play and losing their lives. It's really hard to deal with it."

In the interview with 105.9 The Brew, Russell describes the tragedy as the "9/11 of rock and roll."

Russell is planning a documentary about the Station Nightclub tragedy. In it, he's vowing to apologize – something he says he hasn't done until now, because his lawyers told him it would imply guilt.

"It's really hard, you know but it's going to give me a chance to apologize and say how I feel about it. I never had the chance to say I was sorry," Russell says. "It will get me some peace. I'll never be over it, really, and I don't think I ever should."

Ricardi says he feels like neither Russell nor anyone with the band acted with malice on that terrible night.

"So when I saw the face of Jack Russell, I didn't see the man who fronted a rock band whose pyro killed 100 people. I saw the man who sat down with me and Jim Gahan that night, gave us an interview, gave us free tickets, helped two kids that were chasing a rock and roll dream," Ricardi says. "That's who I see."

But he understands that plenty of other survivors and family members of those who died might disagree with him.

Gina Russo, who survived the fire but whose fiancé was killed, said that "every time [Russell] speaks and brings up The Station, it just hurts the families more and more."

Jody King, whose younger brother Tracey, the nightclub's bouncer, also died that night, said "it's taken [Russell] now 13 years to say 'I'm sorry'? Too little, too late Jack."

"I'm not absolving him of everything happened," Ricardi clarifies, "but I'll always have a different opinion because of what he did for us, and how gracious and generous he was."