"How to Get Anyone To Open Up"
This article appeared in the May 2006 issue of Cosmopolitan Magazine.
As CBS Early Show anchor, Hannah Storm encourages everyone from Senators to celebs to give her the scoop. Here, she shares some tips.
Take Their Cue
There is no way to carry on a conversation - shallow or deep - without listening! After asking the first question, I try to sit back and really hear the response. Don't be so intent on asking your next question that you miss an obvious follow-up to something that just came out of his or her mouth. This is a tactic I've used with a wide variety of interview subjects from Secretary Condoleezza Rice to Charlize Theron. ne of the great follow-up questions of all time: "Why?"
Use a Velvet Hammer
This is a broadcasting expression. It basically means to ask a tough question but in a respectful way. I believe it's the secret to getting people to talk about things they really don't want to talk about. If you wield your hammer properly, the other person won't know what hit him! So instead of asking, "Why do you still live with your mother?" you might say, " I'm sure it's a mixed blessing living at home...How do you like it?" This way, you're getting the info you want but not putting the person on the defensive.
I worked this tactic in a recent interview with actress Penelope Cruz. I needed to ask her about her relationship with Matthew McConaughey, but she never discusses her personal life and I wanted to be respectful of that. So my question was this: "I know you really try to keep your private life private. I'm wondering, is that a hard thing to do with the two of you being such high-profile personalities?" I approached the subject indirectly, and we ended up chatting away! She told me how the hardest part was figuring out how much privacy they were entitled to and that at first she would get angry when somebody asked about them.
Make a Connection
Before I begin an interview, I try to establish some kind of connection - even a thin one. I ask about a safe topic, such as where he had dinner the night before. (This step is very valuable, particularly if the person you're talking to is shy.) For example, upon meeting John Cusack, we chatted about his beloved Chicago Cubs. And when I interviewed Clive Owen, we talked about the fact that we both have young daughters named Hannah. It was a perfect icebreaker.
If you want to use this tactic on dates, there's one releatively fail-safe subject: sports. Just knowing if the favorite local team won or lost the night before, without trying to sound like an expert, can jump-start a conversation.
Go With the Flow
When I was interviewing comedian Jimmy Fallon, we somehow ended up singing the lyrics to the Broadway musical "Tommy." I just took my question page and tossed it in the trash! Again, when talking to Vince Vaughn, we got off on something totally ridiculous, like '80's rock tunes and music trivia!
So here's my advice: Approach your own conversations like an adventure- don't play out a scenario in your mind ahead of time. The person you are talking to might catch you off guard, but if you go with that sharp right-hand turn, it can lead somewhere unexpected and exciting.